I look at myself in the mirror every morning and ask myself who am I? What is my purpose on this Earth? Why am I loved by so many and hated by even more? People go there whoole lives searching for that one thing that makes them happy. I have things that make me happy I just don't understand why. My arrogance can be over whelming at times, even for me. I find myself being very self centered. I step back and look at my self from an outside perspective and still see an incomplete man. No matter how I try to see it, I cant see what everyone else sees. Photo after photo, video after video, story after story I find myself getting an image of a person I don't know.
As I look back on the last few months, i find myself stratched thin... I find i try to make every one happy in hopes of everything one day working itself out, but it seems my determination to do womething good is dragging me deeper and deeper into a hole. A very close person made a metaphor about Getting switzedrland to go to war with you knowing it is and always will be a neutral country. This is how it feels. Better words were never spoken. No matter how hard I try to make everyone happy, the more and more aggitated everyone gets because they dont have my complete attention. So now I have tried to juggle being almost everywhere at one and still no matter how hard i try, its never enough.
When I just spend time with someone who truely is fun to be around people start to complain that I am never around anymore and my pressence is then requested. So I agree to keep the peacebut then all I hear is complaints. So what to do??? Should I just hide under a set of stairs and do my own thing until everyone forgets I was ever there??? will that ever be an option??? Will I ever be able like Ne-yo and fade into the Background??? What to do??? I have accepted that I am the one who has the power to bring people together and even under arguements. So why can't I have the power to make sure everyone is satisfied???
Trying to be everything everyone else wants me to be, but at the end of the day....
Im Only One Man
Boy Wonder Singing off...
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